for once i know exactly how to say it
then someone else speaks up and it slips into my stomach
a bitterness settling in my mouth
my face in my head is different from
my face in the bathroom mirror
white and owlish like roadkill
pinkish gray organs scattered in the street
my name tastes funny when people ask who i am
it slides between my lips like an underwater murmur
sticks to my teeth like butterscotch
it's who my mother wanted me to be
mended fences mean someone is happy again
broken fences mean someone was never happy before
and when they got the chance they took it
i've never broken a fence
i used to swing as high as i could
the night swallowing the ground beneath my bare feet
i'd fling my body into the air to see how long i could fly
when did i become so old and afraid?
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